So Joe has had a diagnosis as being on the autistic spectrum . There simply isn’t room in this blog to explain how Alison his mum is feeling right now but I will try and tackle a few immediate thoughts.
Whilst appearing to resist all information and support from family and friends close to her and going at full pelt, she single-mindedly decides to pull Joe out from his school and home educate him. A massive decision to make so early on bearing in mind the hurt , pain, anger and denial she is naturally experiencing so soon after his diagnosis. She simply needs to stand still for long enough to take stock of the information she has been given about her delightful little boy and seek the advice and support from the professionals out there that are almost waiting in the wings to support this new family with their newly diagnosed little boy.
It’s easy for me to say all this as I too wanted to shut out the people close to me as I had the over-riding feeling of ‘What do they know’ resonating in my head. You almost close down the ranks because of the utter pain and isolation you are feeling now that you realise your child is not the same child as the beautiful baby you gave birth to. It’s completely natural and understandable to initially isolate yourself as you mourn for what you thought you had. I chose to simply ‘start-over’ with my son and assume that he knew absolutely nothing. I then slowly began to teach him all the rules of life, bit by bit in bite-size chunks in a way that he could understand.
Alison is desperately wanting to shield and protect Joe from the cruel world which is probably why she takes him out of school – an important part of Joes life which has huge familiarities and the routine he needs so desperately right now. She then almost drowns herself in autism whilst the people close to her (husband Paul and daughter Rebecca) start to slip away in their own hurt and confusion un -noticed. Even little Joe’s autistic behavior seems to be increasing as he spends a lot of time concentrating on small detail (the coke ring pull), rewinding over and over his favorite parts of songs and repeating back the ends of peoples sentences in a monotone way.
Let’s hope in time Alison starts to slow down a bit and realise that autism isn’t her biggest problem, it’s the consequences of it and Joe’s ability to make relationships which includes the most fundamental one relationship with his mum. This was said to her by Nicola (sister-in-law) who also pointed out that it was a blessing Alison was a fierce character because she is gong to need all the strength she has to get through the next few years……
